Well folks, I hope you were able to join us for our very first webshow on Monday. If not, there will be another one this Monday 16th and I believe we will be continuing them every monday. If you did miss the episode, be sure to catch it on the Slaps facebook page.
Okay, getting that out of the way, its been another great and positive week for me. On a personal level, my children will be returning back to school soon and as will I, to finish my last year of an education major. Woo for Rae! Don't worry, I'll still have time for everyone here. I'll make sure of it.
However, I'm sure you didn't want to read Rae's blog to see how she's trying to pan out her class schedule. Of course not. You want the juicy stuff, I get it. The "super" side, the side that not only helps people so wonderfully, but was also my personal nightmare growing up.
At one psychic party I talked about my past experiences and some of my stories. My talk was barely five minutes in and I could see I was already being looked at with "Get on with it, already" eyes. It was that precise moment in time when I realized that this whole "psychic" stuff wasn't about me. No one cared about how I'd solved murders (yes, really) or how I'd found $1 million for charity (yes, really, I did.). It wasn't about me, it had never been about me - it was about you. Yes you, the one staring at the computer screen. Every one of you whom needs me I have never turned away -I had no right to assume it was about me. My work in the psychic field
HAS to be a selfless act because thats the laws of nature. Remember that choice I've spoken about in the past? Well, thats my choice, I let you come to me and I do all I can to give you what you need to move on, past demons and all.
Yet...at the same time, I was the one who suffered the dreams, seeing things that shouldn't be seen and knowing too much - from a friends father who was having an affair - to a poor friend who had passed away and it wasn't known to my client. Who was there for me? No one, because its a personal journey. I had to be there for me. I had to learn. If I can do it, you guys can.
Am I rambling? So sorry, I do that a lot. People lean on me, when they need that lift up in their life and I'm fine with that. I don't see it as a hinderance - you'll find that I'm proud to help. When I recently visited another psychic (yes, I paid for the privillage), she said some things in my mind that stuck. She said that my gift was different from theirs. That I didn't charge, I was undercutting what I was worth. She also said I wasn't giving myself enough credit for what I did. We somewhat argued, because I told her I once I had charged (a reasonable sum) and couldn't do it, I had to leave my little side room. She told me that my destiny was in this damn feild and I needed to focus on it more. So, I guess joining slaps was a compromise because I can still help yet we don't charge.
This leads to a topic I feel needs to be desperately addressed. I hear all the time "A psychic is a fake, if they charge a fee." Please, don't always think this. Yes, there are some terrible fakes out there and its caused so many problems for us genuine ones. Whether a psychic charges or not, however, should not be used as an "evaluation" of their skills. In my own personal experience, I did my readings for free for years, but I became in high demand. To the point where my husband was getting annoyed. "I really want to do this" I stressed to him and continued onwards for free. Then...the rediculously petty calls came. A lady called to know if she was pregnant (you can't get a test for that?) I was called with "Do you know where my keys are???" Reluctantly, I agreed that I needed to put a stop cap on the petty things.I had people with genuine concerns who needed me more. So, regrettably, I caved in and reasoned with myself that if someone was genuine about me, they would understand and appreciate my gift and wouldn't mind paying for it.
Sitting at my table, in my side room (after spending money to decorate it). I recieved some clients. They were willing to pay, but I hated it. I felt as if I were taking advantage of their personal situtation and all of them needed me on a serious level. I had a college professor who said "I'll pay for more time!! Please tell me more!!" and I just...I just couldn't do it. I told her to put her money away. Another factor I faced charging for my service, was that I really felt I needed to provide these people with a lot of information - especially because they were paying. That added to the pressure and wasn't good for me. The time alotment of 30 minutes never helped my cause, I always had more to tell them. I couldn't use dicipline halfway through a reading and say "Oh, and uncle John wants me to tell you..." then look at my watch "Oh, I'm sorry, if you want more, you need to pay -but your 30 minutes is up.". Then of course, I also had attachments to my clients who easily became friends.
My biggest issue charging clients for a reading was actually fear of being considered a fake, no matter how good my gift. Its always been a problem even if I have nothing to hide. I even hate the term "Psychic" in reference to someone's abilities or gift.I told my husband this, and he said I should refer to myself as an "Interboundary Mediation Coordinator" Yeah..maybe I'll stick to psychic after all? lol.
My favorite phrase from people who meet and know about me is "You don't LOOK like a psychic." Well, eh, would it make you feel better if I sat in a dark room with the curtains closed, peering with long fingernails into my globe of destiny? It won't change my gift, but this is the general perception I get from people. They also expect me to be far older than I am. Understandable, most psychic's take years to get to where I find myself now. Everyone's different and do things differently so I guess there's no 'right' or 'wrong' to it.
Thats a nice way to end the blog, so I'll be speaking to everyone soon. Feel free to add a comment or question, I check my blog often. :)
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Wednesday, August 11, 2010
Sunday, August 1, 2010
An Interesting Week.
Hello Everyone,
I can finally take a breath and look back on this weeks events for Slaps. I had promised you more info about my first investigation, but unfortunately the nature of the case does not make me feel comfortable discussing it so freely on the internet. I can tell you that rather interestingly that we did find possible EVP's. Those will be published on the Slaps website as soon as time permits.
I also went to a second case this week, to a lady who we'll call "Sarah". She desperately needed help with a spirit that she was convinced was following her. To be honest, I've discovered that its very hard for me to talk about the cases we're on. Yes, I've only been on two - but as a psychic and also an investigator, people come to Slaps for help and I do not wish to exploit them. On this occassion with Sarah she gave me permission to talk about her case but I still refuse to give her real name.
Donny and I were the working investigators for this case and we pulled up into Sarah's driveway she was sitting outside, smoking a cigerette and looking nervous. After the introductions, we were invited inside.
My first observations was about the room were were in. It was so small, and it had been painted a burgendy red that simply made the room dark. The window was covered by a fan, and it wasn't a very big window anyway.
Donny began to set up the camcorder, the EMF reader and the voice recorder whilst I sat down and generally tried to get a feel for the building, sending my "spider senses" out, as it were. Its strange, because I've noticed the sharp contrast between the readings I'd do at my little side room at the Wild Rose in Potsdam and actually going out on a case. In my own room I could relax, and I made sure the space was comfortable and mine. In short, I controlled the environment and made it safe, reassuring for my clients - something I cannot do when I'm in someone's home thats allegedly haunted.
Sarah sat opposite of me, and Donny left this matter in my hands. So, simply, I asked her what could be wrong. Sarah was hestiant to say, so I broke the ice and told her some of the information I had picked up on the drive over from where I live. I was fairly accurate, and we were finally able to start talking. Sarah asked me if I could pick up anything from her mother who had passed away. I asked her to sit next to me and took her hands so that I could be more "in tune" with her. Surprisingly, at that time I couldn't get much other than the number "4".
Something was more distracting, and I couldn't say if that was the "feel" of the house, or if it was the heat. Also, sometimes when I don't get anything about a person who has passed away, I like to think its because they were "spiritually content" when they left this world, feeling no need to return since their purpose in life has been completed.
I immediately picked up Sarah's sadness, and other personal information that I'd rather not disclose here - but I have documented them on the report. I sensed lonliness and depression, and I knew she had not been taking tablets that she needed very regularly. I pointed this out to her, which she confirmed. I knew she was scared, and I asked what of.
She had told me she'd had dreams, in a Deja vu fashion. She'd also started seeing a shadow of which, she said one was standing behind her. I too, could sense the presence of a man and we both knew where he was standing. I could tell that she had a gift of her own and I pointed this out to her and asked her what his name was. she instinctively said "Frank" She was naturally scared, but I told her that so was I when I kept seeing things too. I didn't feel that Frank would ever harm her personally and I told her this.
I have a theory about the case, which I understand might sound a bit "out there". I think that due to the sheer amount of trauma that Sarah has suffered over the years that her "minds eye" has opened and thats why she's seeing stuff. Its a defense mechanisim that I've had happen to me. As I explained to the slaps team in my report, imagine going to bed and not seeing spirits to waking up and seeing them all. Suddenly its a shock to the system. Its the same theory that when a person becomes blind, their hearing ability enhances. Sarah had developed a hightened sensitivity.
The situation got surreal the minute I said "Would you like him to leave?" Now granted, it had gone dark outside and the building did have an eerie feel to it. At this point, we had various things happen. We ran out of battery in the camcorder, Donny reported seeing orbs from the backroom where the piano was (again, there was no physical proof of this.). We took another investigative look around the area and although Sarah was pointing out places where Frank was, which I was also seeing. I asked Donny to put the EMF reader in the spots where he "had" been. He was not able to pick up anything of worth - except in the room with the piano. There was a very HIGH EMF reading there, which can cause bouts of paranoia, unease, anxiousness. It means that possibly the house had some electrical wiring issues...I'm not sure, since I'm not a qualified electrictian.
Although I can't really comment on what was wrong exctly, I did warn Sarah that regardless of the cause of the high EMF (not paranormal related) she desperately needed to move house or get her landlord to take a look into it for the safety of her son.
So really, I had to question myself on this one. Its well noted that sensitives are able to pick up on EMF areas more easily than others, but as crazy as it sounds, both Sarah and I were seeing Frank and where he was in the room. I definately got the chills in the room with the piano, but no wonder if it suffers from high EMF's!
I advised that Sarah improve her wellbeing by getting out of the house more, away from the EMF especially. I asked her what she's always wanted to do in life and I've encouraged her to do it. I've advised certain books for her to read to control her gift, and I've taught her visulization techniques to help her relax and for protection. My theory is that the stronger she becomes in her own mind, the easier it will be for her to control Frank and not let him rule her life. Thusfar, she has told me that all this seems to be working... :)
Feel free to ask questions or make comments, I love hearing from you all.
I can finally take a breath and look back on this weeks events for Slaps. I had promised you more info about my first investigation, but unfortunately the nature of the case does not make me feel comfortable discussing it so freely on the internet. I can tell you that rather interestingly that we did find possible EVP's. Those will be published on the Slaps website as soon as time permits.
I also went to a second case this week, to a lady who we'll call "Sarah". She desperately needed help with a spirit that she was convinced was following her. To be honest, I've discovered that its very hard for me to talk about the cases we're on. Yes, I've only been on two - but as a psychic and also an investigator, people come to Slaps for help and I do not wish to exploit them. On this occassion with Sarah she gave me permission to talk about her case but I still refuse to give her real name.
Donny and I were the working investigators for this case and we pulled up into Sarah's driveway she was sitting outside, smoking a cigerette and looking nervous. After the introductions, we were invited inside.
My first observations was about the room were were in. It was so small, and it had been painted a burgendy red that simply made the room dark. The window was covered by a fan, and it wasn't a very big window anyway.
Donny began to set up the camcorder, the EMF reader and the voice recorder whilst I sat down and generally tried to get a feel for the building, sending my "spider senses" out, as it were. Its strange, because I've noticed the sharp contrast between the readings I'd do at my little side room at the Wild Rose in Potsdam and actually going out on a case. In my own room I could relax, and I made sure the space was comfortable and mine. In short, I controlled the environment and made it safe, reassuring for my clients - something I cannot do when I'm in someone's home thats allegedly haunted.
Sarah sat opposite of me, and Donny left this matter in my hands. So, simply, I asked her what could be wrong. Sarah was hestiant to say, so I broke the ice and told her some of the information I had picked up on the drive over from where I live. I was fairly accurate, and we were finally able to start talking. Sarah asked me if I could pick up anything from her mother who had passed away. I asked her to sit next to me and took her hands so that I could be more "in tune" with her. Surprisingly, at that time I couldn't get much other than the number "4".
Something was more distracting, and I couldn't say if that was the "feel" of the house, or if it was the heat. Also, sometimes when I don't get anything about a person who has passed away, I like to think its because they were "spiritually content" when they left this world, feeling no need to return since their purpose in life has been completed.
I immediately picked up Sarah's sadness, and other personal information that I'd rather not disclose here - but I have documented them on the report. I sensed lonliness and depression, and I knew she had not been taking tablets that she needed very regularly. I pointed this out to her, which she confirmed. I knew she was scared, and I asked what of.
She had told me she'd had dreams, in a Deja vu fashion. She'd also started seeing a shadow of which, she said one was standing behind her. I too, could sense the presence of a man and we both knew where he was standing. I could tell that she had a gift of her own and I pointed this out to her and asked her what his name was. she instinctively said "Frank" She was naturally scared, but I told her that so was I when I kept seeing things too. I didn't feel that Frank would ever harm her personally and I told her this.
I have a theory about the case, which I understand might sound a bit "out there". I think that due to the sheer amount of trauma that Sarah has suffered over the years that her "minds eye" has opened and thats why she's seeing stuff. Its a defense mechanisim that I've had happen to me. As I explained to the slaps team in my report, imagine going to bed and not seeing spirits to waking up and seeing them all. Suddenly its a shock to the system. Its the same theory that when a person becomes blind, their hearing ability enhances. Sarah had developed a hightened sensitivity.
The situation got surreal the minute I said "Would you like him to leave?" Now granted, it had gone dark outside and the building did have an eerie feel to it. At this point, we had various things happen. We ran out of battery in the camcorder, Donny reported seeing orbs from the backroom where the piano was (again, there was no physical proof of this.). We took another investigative look around the area and although Sarah was pointing out places where Frank was, which I was also seeing. I asked Donny to put the EMF reader in the spots where he "had" been. He was not able to pick up anything of worth - except in the room with the piano. There was a very HIGH EMF reading there, which can cause bouts of paranoia, unease, anxiousness. It means that possibly the house had some electrical wiring issues...I'm not sure, since I'm not a qualified electrictian.
Although I can't really comment on what was wrong exctly, I did warn Sarah that regardless of the cause of the high EMF (not paranormal related) she desperately needed to move house or get her landlord to take a look into it for the safety of her son.
So really, I had to question myself on this one. Its well noted that sensitives are able to pick up on EMF areas more easily than others, but as crazy as it sounds, both Sarah and I were seeing Frank and where he was in the room. I definately got the chills in the room with the piano, but no wonder if it suffers from high EMF's!
I advised that Sarah improve her wellbeing by getting out of the house more, away from the EMF especially. I asked her what she's always wanted to do in life and I've encouraged her to do it. I've advised certain books for her to read to control her gift, and I've taught her visulization techniques to help her relax and for protection. My theory is that the stronger she becomes in her own mind, the easier it will be for her to control Frank and not let him rule her life. Thusfar, she has told me that all this seems to be working... :)
Feel free to ask questions or make comments, I love hearing from you all.
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